I have one main life goal.
“Become a cool old lady.”
Technically, there are two sub-goals:
Don't die young.
Do as many interesting things as I sustainably can so I have a maximally interesting story to tell when I'm old.
Unfortunately, aside from eating healthy, exercising, and not doing reckless things, I don’t have much control over the first one. C’est la vie.
The second one is key.
When I look back, I want to be proud of the risks I attempted and the adventures I chased. Regardless of how they turned out.
People like to overcomplicate “life purpose.” One way to think about it is simply “how to create the most interesting story possible.”
But what makes a good life story?
Why You Should Think of Life as a Movie
When it comes to crafting an impactful movie, it’s not about making every moment easy and happy. There’s conflict, tension, and action. Sometimes your car veers off into a ditch and you just have to figure it out.
But that’s what makes it worth watching.
You want to chase things with payoff. With twists and turns.
This explains why people choose the hard but fulfilling things:
Parents have kids despite studies suggesting they might be less “happy.”
Entrepreneurs work crazy hours to make their ideas real.
People quit their jobs to travel the world or pursue unconventional dreams.
Payoff takes time. Twists and turns require risk and uncertainty.
It’s about creating a good life story.
What Makes a Good Story
What makes a “good story” is entirely up to you. It’s not a race, there’s no comparison. Stories can be fast or slow paced. Everyone is crafting one that’s unique to them.
As long as your story is memorable and meaningful, it’s a story worth telling.
What makes a story memorable?
Feelings. Your favorite movie sticks in your mind because of the emotional journey it took you on. The visuals, plot points, and setting all matter, but they all work together to make you feel things.
What makes a story meaningful?
Growth and learning. Every single character you fall in love with on screen experiences some transformation. In a movie, it’s called character development. Therein lies the meaning.
Real life is the same. To live a memorable life, chase the things that excite you and risk vulnerability. To live a meaningful life, chase growth and learning.
How to Make Your Story Interesting
This week, I stumbled across this two-minute video from the creators of South Park on how to tell a good story.
You can apply the exercise to your life too.
Essentially, list out some events and find how they fit together. Are they linked by “AND THEN” or by “BUT” and “THEREFORE”? For example:
I got a degree in computer science and enjoyed it
(THEREFORE) I applied and got a job in tech in SF
(AND THEN) I worked there for a few years
(BUT) I didn’t feel like it was the best fit for me
(THEREFORE) I decided to move across the country and quit
(BUT) I needed to figure out what to do instead
(THEREFORE) I’m now writing this newsletter and trying lots of creative things around the things I care about
“BUT” and “THEREFORE” indicate causation. One event informs the next, as opposed to just passive progression or unrelated events.
The greatest stories are full of “BUT”s and “THEREFORE”s.
This Week: Try It Yourself
Take a current project or phase of your life and put “AND THEN” versus “THEREFORE” and “BUT” between the events.
Are your actions actively progressing your story? Are you chasing twists and payoffs? Or are you just going through the motions?
Are you chasing experiences that will make you feel things when you look back? Do you feel proud, angry, happy? Or has it just been a blur of events?
Create a life story you’d be excited to tell.
Hi, I’m Kat! Welcome to my newsletter—your weekly dose of mindset, perspective, and mental health for sustainable success.
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— Kat